sac·cha·rine

The Lovelyish office is movin’ on up — only literally. In the same building. OK guys, we’re on the 19th floor now. Which is something!

The new space affords us more natural light, a larger area for aerobics (if we so choose to start exercising) and best of all — a super close by bathroom. The old office also had one nearby, but it was a whole turn and hallway away! Not the case here. It’s immediately next door which is very convenient since I pee as frequently as a very pregnant woman (which I am not, I should point out, even a little preggo).

However, the door leading into the two-stall room, for reasons I do not know, remains stuck open unless forced shut. So as not to let passerby and late-arriving coworkers hear my tinkle, I hoist it shut all nine times a day. Then, thanks to science I guess, the closed door offsets an inundation of ruckus. It’s like closing the door actually opens a vortex to another very windy force field.

After the windstorms ignite, one must note the apparently drunkle-built stalls. Hooking a shoe beneath the bottom of the door is absolutely necessary in shackling it closed. Then the pee-er is left in the mostly-dark, accompanied usually only by the howl of the imaginary gusts raging in the hallway. I cannot speak from experience, but I liken the visit to that of a rickety outhouse jaunt amidst a mild cyclone.

So the 19th floor wins again!