What are … what … stal … ig … tighties?– Lianne, trying to figure out what the hell that cave formation is anyway whilst reading about Chiang Dao in Lonely Planet (aka our Bible).
Me: OK, I'm sorry but I'm coming to a breaking point. I'm about to do something pretty gross and fucked up so don't look.
Me: This toenail. This big toenail here on my left foot is driving me crazy. I keep trying to peel it off but it doesn't work. I'm going to chew it off.
Lianne: That's fine. I won't watch. You just showered so I guess it's not that gross.
Lianne: So you finally got tired of your fingernails?
I haven't done laundry in about 10 days.
I just sniffed the only bra I brought with me on this trip. Big mistake.
Things I definitely will miss about Thailand:
- no one wearing shoes indoors. Neither do I. I want the rest of the world to assimilate … now, please. - super spicy food. It’s never spicy enough in the States. - super salty food. Apparently this is to replenish all of the sodium sweated out throughout the rest of the day (and often night, too). I’ll take it. With soy sauce. - mad cheap street food. It’s everywhere...
Things I definitely won't miss about Thailand:
- honking red taxis and having “tuk-tuk” shouted at us regularly. Once Lianne got her hair hacked and straightened, she never got harassed unless I was with her. - covering up at sweltering wats. I totally respect that is part of Buddhist beliefs and it’s a holy place so it makes sense. It just kind of blows toting around my sarong with my already-bursting bag just in case we...
Why did I decide to pack my most...
Because those damn, bleached Cheap Mondays roll up too small to deny. However, it does earn whitey a few more stares than otherwise in this tiny, indigenous mountain town.
Getting lost can be a trying experience, especially when it keeps happening and it’s 105 degrees out and all the signs look like they’re just decorated with swirls. When Lianne and I get lost, we remedy our frustration with a) beer b) massages c) both a and b If you answered c, well damn. You are correct. And off we go to the Sunday Market.
I have a bad impression of Brooklyn. I used to think I was allergic to it...– Lianne
But sure enough, you learn that it’s just a pretty glowing thing, not...– Joel